Navigating the Plus One Dilemma: How to Decide Who Gets a Plus One at Your Wedding

Tips and Etiquette for Determining Plus Ones and Ensuring a Memorable Celebration

Photo: Chris Kim | Planning: Kesh Events

Planning a wedding involves making countless decisions, and one that often stirs up some debate is determining who gets a plus one. Balancing your budget, venue capacity, and creating a meaningful guest list can be challenging, but with some thoughtful consideration and a touch of wedding etiquette, you can navigate the plus one dilemma with grace. In this article, we'll provide you with practical tips to help you decide who receives a plus one invitation and ensure a memorable celebration for all.

1. Define Your Wedding Guest List :

Criteria: Begin by establishing clear criteria for determining who will receive a plus one invitation. Consider factors such as the length and seriousness of the relationship, whether the guest will know other attendees, and your overall guest count and budget.

2. Communicate Clearly:

Clearly communicate your plus one policy on your wedding invitations or wedding website. Make it known whether the invitation extends to single guests only or if there are specific guidelines for plus ones, such as being engaged or in a long-term committed relationship.

3. Accommodate Married and Engaged Couples:

It is customary to invite married couples and those who are engaged to be married to your wedding with a plus one. This acknowledges their committed relationship and allows them to celebrate as a couple.

4. Consider Established Couples:

For couples who have been in a committed relationship for a significant period, it is courteous to extend a plus one invitation. This helps ensure they feel comfortable and can fully enjoy the celebration.



5. Evaluate Single Guests:

For single guests, use your discretion based on their social connections. If they will know other attendees, such as close friends or family members, it may not be necessary to provide a plus one. However, if the guest may not know anyone else, consider offering them the option to bring a date to make them feel more at ease.

6. Be Consistent:

To maintain fairness, consistency is key. Apply your plus one policy consistently across all guests to avoid any misunderstandings or hurt feelings.

7. Have Some Flexibility for Special Circumstances:

Be open to considering special circumstances where a plus one might be appropriate. This could include a guest who will be traveling from afar or a close friend who may not know many other attendees.

8. Personalize Your Approach:

Remember that every wedding is unique, and your guest list should reflect your personal preferences. Consider your venue capacity, budget constraints, and the overall atmosphere you desire for your celebration.

Deciding who gets a plus one at your wedding requires thoughtful consideration and clear communication. By defining your criteria, being consistent, and considering the circumstances of your guests, you can navigate this aspect of wedding planning with ease. Ultimately, the goal is to create a memorable celebration where both you and your guests feel comfortable and surrounded by loved ones.

Happy Planning xx

Akeshi Akinseye
Akeshi Akinseye

Founder & CEO of Kesh Events | Event Planner, Designer, Author & Hospitality Expert

Akeshi Akinseye is the founder and CEO of Kesh Events, a Chicago-based event planning, design and production company creating high-end weddings, destination celebrations, private events and brand experiences worldwide.

With more than 15 years of experience, her work centers on thoughtful hospitality, guest experience, cultural intelligence and the planning, design and production of highly considered celebrations.

Akeshi is also the author of The Art of Celebrating, a book about meaningful gatherings, thoughtful design and creating more intentional moments around the table and at home.

Her work and perspective on weddings, celebrations, design and hospitality have been featured in The New York Times, Forbes, Brides, People and other leading publications.

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